Love IV

There was,

was a point when

I no longer shied

from an incommensurable fact.

The woman who when

she heard ‘cancer’ turned from

antagonism and distance to be-

come comforting and gentle,

was yet calculating

if not then, when, sub

rosa my eviction from my

home our property might be

arranged. But it would come.

Until the heard word occurred

all unseen inside, the growths, the

aggregate organism growing feeding

towards her final resolution of our

metastasizing divergence happy

solution soon to be my remains.

The woman I loved and loved and

never needed more, wept begging

for mercy for comfort for a visit:

Was engineering my exclusion

eviction final dissolution dust and

ashes. She will bury me. I imagine

this may make her (sub?)con-

consciously happy, it will clearly

be a relief from fears a load off her

mind, an end of blockages and

barriers. Bound she will be never-

more. I doubt she will thank God.

Nor any one any thing else but

her own proud self, and her friend

and her mater’s mind. These seem

to be material and contributing

witnesses to her fears and desires

offering their own neurotic angers

in her service to eliminate me for

good, her good my death. In-

credible. Yet accurate.

For my good, an end.

Good bye.